official footage of BFK
check it out
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pvl3jiXHBQQ
BFK strikes again (featdanthedude!)
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danthedude66
- Senior Member
- Posts: 537
- Joined: Tue Sep 19, 2006 10:05 pm
BFK strikes again (featdanthedude!)
i hate swede
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danthedude66
- Senior Member
- Posts: 537
- Joined: Tue Sep 19, 2006 10:05 pm
-
danthedude66
- Senior Member
- Posts: 537
- Joined: Tue Sep 19, 2006 10:05 pm
Re: BFK strikes again (featdanthedude!)
haha !!! i know that pub lol
:P
The BFK was on a mission. This city had been razed to the ground. The third chip whizziwigs were stone. He wasn't in the pink and everything was chipped up, £30 for a board and bluer than a bluey.
Even the top secret method on Hot Property was no good. TIJ4 was burned, Cops burned.
He'd been on a mission to find some gems, an Extreme and a Ziggy, an unchipped p5, a 4 reeler, an underfloated card shark. The only one he'd found had been the latter. Apart from a slightly generous Games media in a sports bar, the rest was all disasterous.
He'd tried the roughest toughest pubs, for he was THE BFK and would go where no other players would dare. No such luck, everything was dead, switched off, empty or shit.
How dare this city mock him? How dare it!!!!! BFK was seething. He had NEVER EVER EVER EVER left anywhere losing. BFK DOES NOT LOSE MONEY - EVER. HE WILL BURN YOUR TOWN AND DISCOVER ALL YOUR HIDDEN TREASURES AND FIND A FEW EXTRA THINGS THAT YOU DID NOT KNOW EXISTED. BFK was the king of players. Even the super duper methods, barely hinted on The Interweb were to no avail, this day for the BFK.
It's not that cluey JG, growled BFK to himself. He dareth not venture into *that* pub for the p2 whizziwig. He's probably hiding in Gala taking a hiding on some Golden Xs. Who had killed this city so badly?
There could be only one, super person, one person who could do that.
Can you guess who that person is??
Da na da na da na da NA .......
NUDGEMAN.....
The caped crusader rushed in and peeked through the glass. A snakez, an Attack, a Deal and a Rockstar. There was no mistaking it, the BFK was on the attack. <<GULP>> This was one hit he had missed out. The BFK might claw back some cash.
Soon he was toggling up to £105, revolving to £70 and wanting to give himself a lot of money for £88 and red rocking to £35. He was up, not much, but he was up. He'd get to the BFKmobile and exit this city sharpish. He'd won, he could leave with his dignity intact. NO ONE OUTSMARTED THE BFK, if anyone else had come here today, they'd have been £1000s down.
"NOT SO FAST BFK" boomed the Nudgeman as he snatched the microphone from the Scottish lady.
In an instant the BFK turned around, Nudgeman ducked. His identity must remain secret. Once you started fraternising with other players, you got videod on Youtube and fame was not what he wanted, just the fortune. It was too late, BFK was exiting stage left and entering stage right (seperate shops for new laws regarding B3 machines). The law prohibited him from using the code on the interconnecting door, that is for staff only.
"The Nudgeman ran up the stairs", the story continued over the loudspeakers. He looked back at a Chuzzy kit and carried on running. The hulk of the BFK was at the base of the stairs, he could hear the angry footsteps.
'COME BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SCROTUM' bellowed the BFK
Nudgeman darted through the door at the top of the stairs. What could he do now? He was trapped, all the windows were barred and the BFK would sniff him out for sure. He could lock himself in the loo, but BFK would break down the door and Youtube him for proper. He'd probably hold him hostage, drag him to <<bloop>> and get him to miss GUAC on purpose on pain of death.
He had to keep running. Maz was eating a cheese sandwhich in the staff room upstairs, maybe he could run in there? No too wierd. Already the hounds were after the microphone.
"He's stolen the microphone" the Scottish tones wafting over the plod, plod, plod of the BFKs footsteps.
Still running, he grapped a sign about £500 jackpots, a wheel of fortune thing from an old promotion and in vain tried to barricade the door. He paced around, lots of locked doors to old stores, he ran into the ladies toilet and locked the door. Maybe Maz would sort out the BFK. Yes that would help.
He crouched nervously in the ladies.
There was a THUNDEROUS BFK style knock on the door.
"FEEEEEE FIIIIIIIIII FOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THUMB!!!!! I smell the blood of A NUDGEMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
JG feigned silence.
"YOU ARE LOCKED IN THE LADIES TOILETS. YOU WILL COME OUT OF THERE, REVEAL YOUSELF TO THE BFK AND APOLOGISE FOR PLAYING ALL THE DEALS. THEN I SHALL FILM YOU PLAYING A CLUEDO."
"I'm a lady, on the toilet, please go away."
"YOU ARE CERTAINLY ACTING LIKE A BIG GIRL'S BLOUSE. COME OUT AND HAVE YOUR PICTURE TAKEN, PLAYING A CLEUDO, THERE'S A GOOD BOY."
This had gone so wrong, so badly wrong. Where was Maz? Where was Robin? Where was anyone apart from him inside the ladies and BFK, just outside.
There was no option, he'd have to flush himself down the toilet.
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
He was in the sewers. Thank God. It stank, but at least the BFK wasn't going to film him deliberately missing a GUAC. He'd probably get him to miss it around the £5 mark. Maybe a few shaky one offs as well then a full blown miss. Or he'd video him playing a GGG like a muntling.
This was like the Shawshank redemption, just crawl through some shit and he'd escape from the evil BFK. There was a sudden woosh. BFK was in the sewers.
"YOU CANNOT ESCAPE. BFK WILL SEEK YOU OUT."
"Aaaraaaarrrrrggghhhhhhh no!!"
He ran in pitch darkness, surely the BFK would not catch him, in fact why had he not got blocked up in the S bend? Floundering about he ran and ran and ran and ran and stopped.
A faint spash, splash, splash echoed from further up the pipe.
Nightmare. He may be able to outrun BFK but he was definitely splashing towards him. He stepped up onto a parapet and stood like a statue. It was pitch black, surely the BFK would splash on past him?
sploosh....splash....splash the splashes got louder.
louder.
LOUDER.
There was silence.
The BFK was very near, VERY VERY near. HE knew Nudgeman was hiding. He knew.
"YOU SNIVELLING TOAD. NO ONE SPEAKS TO THE BFK on an ARCADE MICROPHONE. I SHALL SEEK OUT YOUR LOCATION AND MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A RIGHT CLUEY ON YOUTUBE. I SHALL FILM YOU MISSING A LEVEL ONE SKILL CONTINUE with CANCEL HELD DOWN."
So very loud. So very near. Just stay still. Stay serene. He will go. Hopefully.
"YOU LITTLE RAT. I CAN SMELL YOU, YOU STINKY RAT. THE BFK WILL WRING YOUR NECK LIKE THE BFK WOULD WRING OUT ALL THE VALUE FROM A DYING WINSTOPPER. NUDGEMAN I SHALL DESTROY YOU."
Perhaps a fake location for a p2 whizziwig might win him over? No Nudgeman had to maintain silence. It was then that his mobile started to ring. As it rung it lit up the sewer and the BFK and the Nudgeman stared at each other for a split second.
There was a mini parked up, with the keys in the ignition in the next bay along. Nudgeman legged it to the mini, in he got and floored it. HE HAD ESCAPED THE BFK!!!!
Whew! Must be away out of here somewhere, this mini was better than The Nudgemobile. Hmmm. A left or a right? Right. Then left. BFK must be stuck back in the sewer. All he needed to do now was find a gate out into the open and park up, abandon the car and go home.
He relaxed somewhat.
POARP! PARP! PARP!!!!!! The full beam flickered onto his retina via the rear view mirror. Another mini was up his tail. He looked nervously into the mirror. It was Maz. She had chased him down here. Then he realised why, the mic was still in his hand.
"Stop the car!" said Maz, her voice squeaking out a loud hailer mounted on top of the pursuit car, "It's 1:29 we need the mic back for a rainbow bingo promotion. I have to make an announcement to the shop at 1:30!, surrender the mic!"
"Don't panic" said a familiar voice in the passenger side, "we just need to get you out of here, take the next left."
Nudgeman took the next left. 'Thanks'
"No problem."
"Hey, errrr who are you?"
"I am....................
.....................the
................................BOX FRESH KESH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Nudgeman nearly shat himself.
"You're in the right place for shitting yourself. if you do actually want to that is. Now take the next right, get out of here and follow my instructions, so you understand, no escape tactics...NOW FLOOR IT, FLOOR it."
"What?"
"Put your foot down, put your foot down we're losing speed."
"Eh?"
"GET THE WHEELS IN LINE!!! GET THE WHEELS IN LINE!!!""
"Yes, but where are we going? We need a map."
"The map, will be in your head Chris."
"I'm not called Chris.........."
They approached the gate out the sewer, it was starting to close. Maz was still hot on their tail.
"I NEED THAT MICROPHONE BACK, YOU ARE TRAPPED IN THE SEWER, THAT MICROPHONE IS THE PROPERTY OF THOMAS ESTATES AND MUST BE SURRENDERED."
Nudgeman yanked the wheel onto full lock, wound down the passenger window, said "Hang on a monent, I've got a great idea" and pushed out the BFK, drove under the closing gate by a fraction of a millisecond, leaving Maz to crush THE BFK.
Freedom, he drove on to his favourite cluedo, banged in a MS and lived happily, for now.
He went back to the cave, showered and lay down in some mildeew.
The nudgephone rang.
"THIS. IS THE BFK and I'M ALMIGHTILY ANGRY."
"Well yes old boy. Burnt out, flushed out and pushed out. Bad day was it?"
"NO NOT REALLY. I MET UP WITH AN OLD ACCOMPLICE. THE JACKPOT JOKER. Heard of him?"
"Errrrrrrrr maybe"
"Well listen. I, THE BFK HAVE TEAMED UP WITH THE JJ and we will destroy the JG AND THE NUDGEMAN. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED."
The phone crackled and hissed, it was the jackpot joker,
"'tis true, I'm not getting any younger and BFK is a mighty fine replacement for myself. I have no doubt BFK will crush you in due course Nudgeman."
The phone went dead. The game was on.
Nudgeman tried to go to sleep.
To be continued..............
Even the top secret method on Hot Property was no good. TIJ4 was burned, Cops burned.
He'd been on a mission to find some gems, an Extreme and a Ziggy, an unchipped p5, a 4 reeler, an underfloated card shark. The only one he'd found had been the latter. Apart from a slightly generous Games media in a sports bar, the rest was all disasterous.
He'd tried the roughest toughest pubs, for he was THE BFK and would go where no other players would dare. No such luck, everything was dead, switched off, empty or shit.
How dare this city mock him? How dare it!!!!! BFK was seething. He had NEVER EVER EVER EVER left anywhere losing. BFK DOES NOT LOSE MONEY - EVER. HE WILL BURN YOUR TOWN AND DISCOVER ALL YOUR HIDDEN TREASURES AND FIND A FEW EXTRA THINGS THAT YOU DID NOT KNOW EXISTED. BFK was the king of players. Even the super duper methods, barely hinted on The Interweb were to no avail, this day for the BFK.
It's not that cluey JG, growled BFK to himself. He dareth not venture into *that* pub for the p2 whizziwig. He's probably hiding in Gala taking a hiding on some Golden Xs. Who had killed this city so badly?
There could be only one, super person, one person who could do that.
Can you guess who that person is??
Da na da na da na da NA .......
NUDGEMAN.....
The caped crusader rushed in and peeked through the glass. A snakez, an Attack, a Deal and a Rockstar. There was no mistaking it, the BFK was on the attack. <<GULP>> This was one hit he had missed out. The BFK might claw back some cash.
Soon he was toggling up to £105, revolving to £70 and wanting to give himself a lot of money for £88 and red rocking to £35. He was up, not much, but he was up. He'd get to the BFKmobile and exit this city sharpish. He'd won, he could leave with his dignity intact. NO ONE OUTSMARTED THE BFK, if anyone else had come here today, they'd have been £1000s down.
"NOT SO FAST BFK" boomed the Nudgeman as he snatched the microphone from the Scottish lady.
In an instant the BFK turned around, Nudgeman ducked. His identity must remain secret. Once you started fraternising with other players, you got videod on Youtube and fame was not what he wanted, just the fortune. It was too late, BFK was exiting stage left and entering stage right (seperate shops for new laws regarding B3 machines). The law prohibited him from using the code on the interconnecting door, that is for staff only.
"The Nudgeman ran up the stairs", the story continued over the loudspeakers. He looked back at a Chuzzy kit and carried on running. The hulk of the BFK was at the base of the stairs, he could hear the angry footsteps.
'COME BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SCROTUM' bellowed the BFK
Nudgeman darted through the door at the top of the stairs. What could he do now? He was trapped, all the windows were barred and the BFK would sniff him out for sure. He could lock himself in the loo, but BFK would break down the door and Youtube him for proper. He'd probably hold him hostage, drag him to <<bloop>> and get him to miss GUAC on purpose on pain of death.
He had to keep running. Maz was eating a cheese sandwhich in the staff room upstairs, maybe he could run in there? No too wierd. Already the hounds were after the microphone.
"He's stolen the microphone" the Scottish tones wafting over the plod, plod, plod of the BFKs footsteps.
Still running, he grapped a sign about £500 jackpots, a wheel of fortune thing from an old promotion and in vain tried to barricade the door. He paced around, lots of locked doors to old stores, he ran into the ladies toilet and locked the door. Maybe Maz would sort out the BFK. Yes that would help.
He crouched nervously in the ladies.
There was a THUNDEROUS BFK style knock on the door.
"FEEEEEE FIIIIIIIIII FOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THUMB!!!!! I smell the blood of A NUDGEMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
JG feigned silence.
"YOU ARE LOCKED IN THE LADIES TOILETS. YOU WILL COME OUT OF THERE, REVEAL YOUSELF TO THE BFK AND APOLOGISE FOR PLAYING ALL THE DEALS. THEN I SHALL FILM YOU PLAYING A CLUEDO."
"I'm a lady, on the toilet, please go away."
"YOU ARE CERTAINLY ACTING LIKE A BIG GIRL'S BLOUSE. COME OUT AND HAVE YOUR PICTURE TAKEN, PLAYING A CLEUDO, THERE'S A GOOD BOY."
This had gone so wrong, so badly wrong. Where was Maz? Where was Robin? Where was anyone apart from him inside the ladies and BFK, just outside.
There was no option, he'd have to flush himself down the toilet.
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
He was in the sewers. Thank God. It stank, but at least the BFK wasn't going to film him deliberately missing a GUAC. He'd probably get him to miss it around the £5 mark. Maybe a few shaky one offs as well then a full blown miss. Or he'd video him playing a GGG like a muntling.
This was like the Shawshank redemption, just crawl through some shit and he'd escape from the evil BFK. There was a sudden woosh. BFK was in the sewers.
"YOU CANNOT ESCAPE. BFK WILL SEEK YOU OUT."
"Aaaraaaarrrrrggghhhhhhh no!!"
He ran in pitch darkness, surely the BFK would not catch him, in fact why had he not got blocked up in the S bend? Floundering about he ran and ran and ran and ran and stopped.
A faint spash, splash, splash echoed from further up the pipe.
Nightmare. He may be able to outrun BFK but he was definitely splashing towards him. He stepped up onto a parapet and stood like a statue. It was pitch black, surely the BFK would splash on past him?
sploosh....splash....splash the splashes got louder.
louder.
LOUDER.
There was silence.
The BFK was very near, VERY VERY near. HE knew Nudgeman was hiding. He knew.
"YOU SNIVELLING TOAD. NO ONE SPEAKS TO THE BFK on an ARCADE MICROPHONE. I SHALL SEEK OUT YOUR LOCATION AND MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A RIGHT CLUEY ON YOUTUBE. I SHALL FILM YOU MISSING A LEVEL ONE SKILL CONTINUE with CANCEL HELD DOWN."
So very loud. So very near. Just stay still. Stay serene. He will go. Hopefully.
"YOU LITTLE RAT. I CAN SMELL YOU, YOU STINKY RAT. THE BFK WILL WRING YOUR NECK LIKE THE BFK WOULD WRING OUT ALL THE VALUE FROM A DYING WINSTOPPER. NUDGEMAN I SHALL DESTROY YOU."
Perhaps a fake location for a p2 whizziwig might win him over? No Nudgeman had to maintain silence. It was then that his mobile started to ring. As it rung it lit up the sewer and the BFK and the Nudgeman stared at each other for a split second.
There was a mini parked up, with the keys in the ignition in the next bay along. Nudgeman legged it to the mini, in he got and floored it. HE HAD ESCAPED THE BFK!!!!
Whew! Must be away out of here somewhere, this mini was better than The Nudgemobile. Hmmm. A left or a right? Right. Then left. BFK must be stuck back in the sewer. All he needed to do now was find a gate out into the open and park up, abandon the car and go home.
He relaxed somewhat.
POARP! PARP! PARP!!!!!! The full beam flickered onto his retina via the rear view mirror. Another mini was up his tail. He looked nervously into the mirror. It was Maz. She had chased him down here. Then he realised why, the mic was still in his hand.
"Stop the car!" said Maz, her voice squeaking out a loud hailer mounted on top of the pursuit car, "It's 1:29 we need the mic back for a rainbow bingo promotion. I have to make an announcement to the shop at 1:30!, surrender the mic!"
"Don't panic" said a familiar voice in the passenger side, "we just need to get you out of here, take the next left."
Nudgeman took the next left. 'Thanks'
"No problem."
"Hey, errrr who are you?"
"I am....................
.....................the
................................BOX FRESH KESH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Nudgeman nearly shat himself.
"You're in the right place for shitting yourself. if you do actually want to that is. Now take the next right, get out of here and follow my instructions, so you understand, no escape tactics...NOW FLOOR IT, FLOOR it."
"What?"
"Put your foot down, put your foot down we're losing speed."
"Eh?"
"GET THE WHEELS IN LINE!!! GET THE WHEELS IN LINE!!!""
"Yes, but where are we going? We need a map."
"The map, will be in your head Chris."
"I'm not called Chris.........."
They approached the gate out the sewer, it was starting to close. Maz was still hot on their tail.
"I NEED THAT MICROPHONE BACK, YOU ARE TRAPPED IN THE SEWER, THAT MICROPHONE IS THE PROPERTY OF THOMAS ESTATES AND MUST BE SURRENDERED."
Nudgeman yanked the wheel onto full lock, wound down the passenger window, said "Hang on a monent, I've got a great idea" and pushed out the BFK, drove under the closing gate by a fraction of a millisecond, leaving Maz to crush THE BFK.
Freedom, he drove on to his favourite cluedo, banged in a MS and lived happily, for now.
He went back to the cave, showered and lay down in some mildeew.
The nudgephone rang.
"THIS. IS THE BFK and I'M ALMIGHTILY ANGRY."
"Well yes old boy. Burnt out, flushed out and pushed out. Bad day was it?"
"NO NOT REALLY. I MET UP WITH AN OLD ACCOMPLICE. THE JACKPOT JOKER. Heard of him?"
"Errrrrrrrr maybe"
"Well listen. I, THE BFK HAVE TEAMED UP WITH THE JJ and we will destroy the JG AND THE NUDGEMAN. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED."
The phone crackled and hissed, it was the jackpot joker,
"'tis true, I'm not getting any younger and BFK is a mighty fine replacement for myself. I have no doubt BFK will crush you in due course Nudgeman."
The phone went dead. The game was on.
Nudgeman tried to go to sleep.
To be continued..............
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thecannonball89
- Senior Member
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- Joined: Fri Jan 25, 2008 9:25 pm
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Re: BFK strikes again (featdanthedude!)
Are you that lad who was up st osyth? and the same lad who tried to get on them £5 games in ceasures hemsby the otherday?
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trayhop123
- Senior Member
- Posts: 4901
- Joined: Tue Jan 22, 2008 9:21 pm
- Location: leicester
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HorseRacingKing
- Senior Member
- Posts: 1102
- Joined: Thu Dec 06, 2007 10:13 am
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TEKNOWARRIOR
- Junior Member
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tossers
what a fuckin fat munt