My own brand of Drivel

General fruit machine related chat, if it doesn't fit another category discuss it here..
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Ruler of The World
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My own brand of Drivel

Post by Ruler of The World »

Well since all I read here is utter bollocks I might as well start up my own thread.

The state of machines these days is great, I feel very comfortable going around doing whatever there is to be done and then going to the next place, then the next.... etc.

I don't last as long as I used to on the fruits, used to put in 16 hour days, now I can barely handle 12. Good that I gave up on the FOBTs because my lucky streak on that £500 slot ended and I decided to quit while I'm ahead - something I can't say about any other £500 slot.

I was in an arcade the other day rowing for England on a random and it dropped in a jackpot although I can't for the life of me figure out how it was jackpot because it looked like about £70 to me but it paid out £500! That was a good result but going to the casino after wasn't... again.

I only lose money in casinos now, horses are absolutely hopeless for me, I simply have NO luck (not good anyway). I make a habit of trying to save up and never take more than 10% of what I have in total with me to the casino.

Checking certain games for life is rather costly and frustrating, but it has to be done. I made over £500 in a service station the other day without even touching a machine with over £70 jackpot, Apart from that, I think fruits are for the really thick people these days and because of this I believe I can still make money - as long as I can stand their stench in the pub/services.

Disappointing that service station toilets are so dirty these days, certain games seem to habitually cause me to almost crap myself.

For those of you who are not so smart, there IS a cryptic message within this post, however it might not be very useful to you, but it is to me!

I think most if not all will agree, this post is utter drivel. Maybe waffle? Rambling? Something like that.
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JG
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Post by JG »

Hello. There is still phat money to be made if you know what you're doing. I know what I'm doing and those that know me and know what I'm doing, know that I know, that I know, that they know, that I know, that they know that I know they know I know what I'm doing.
I have a route of 15 flickers, 16 flockers and 17 flackers. I usually find the flickers flat, the flockers locked and the flackers knackered.
I'm currently doing a Devil of a Deal on The Isle of Man. On Mondays I go there. On Tuesdays I get in my time machine and travel to The Brass House on Broad Street Birmingham. I set the year to 2007 and the month to June or earlier. There's a beggar outside who gives me a lecture on ignoring beggars and the dial notey is out in the Lloyds opposite but for some reason it's full in The Brass House. A man in a suit watches me play so I have to keep not taking the winstopper feature.
On Wednesdays I take time out to hone my Poker Affiliate business. I basically work in the on line poker industry shouting out that it's not rigged, programming increasingly subtle bot alogorithms that check call all the way down to the river with junk that hits by 4th or 5th street. I am paid $600/hour for doing this.
On Thursdays I travel around ALL the service stations in the UK leaving £70 boxes in the East WIng West Wings just to annoy Dude_Se. I also mess around with the Labyrinths so that they don't take coins and don't respond to the touch screen. Sometimes I paint over Dond LIVE and Rapid Rounds with red paint so that he thinks they're red reeling, when in fact they're not.
On Fridays I travel around with Rob and we play random £500 jackpot machines. We usually win more than we lose and we set out at 5am. At 7am we ring OB and wonder why he doesn't answer. At 11:30am OB rings back and expresses UBER annoyance at being woken up at such an early hour. Despite the phat raises, the part where OB gets woken up, always tickles me the most.
On Saturdays I go to work and earn £6.50/hr. Rob rings me up and tells me that he isn't playing machines today but he has just popped into The Mecca and made £500 off Pure Pots. The stories continue like that until he is about £10k up on his 'non' playing day as a pose to my £26 pre tax wages.
On Sundays I just chill out and offer an after dinner raconteur service for anyone who woshes to book me. If anyone is unaware of what this entails, it entrails me dressing up as a racoon after everyone has finished eating. To be honest I've received some negative feedback because of this. I am still trying to get to grips with Sundays.
Every 4th Tuesday of the week I set my time machine to go to Hunstanton instead. It gives The Brass House dial time to recover and I get to play the triple Machine X before I stop back at Spalding and maybe Peterborough trying my best to avoid Boston as it's such mega heat and I know I'll just play the HOF instead whilst the bloke tells me it used to be a shoe shop and the locals make jokes about me being an outsider who isn't Eastern European.
Hunstanton is always phat. I allocate myself 10 minutes on the Machine Xs and 2 hours on retro Cat D crap. This last yesterday's Tuesday I spent the whole two hours in Andy's Amusements. I sold him a Stadium PSU for £280, an EPOCH main board for £120 and some new sticky label decals for a 1'er. In the meantime I did £500 in his Eastenders which kept reel alarming every time I tried to cross Albert Square.


Edit: Just a word of warning. I think they've chipped flickers. I've got one that trail holds on 25p stake in Central London, but often isn't boarding. Cashpot isn't free anymore and it blag wilds and doesn't always see the £50 kings.
JG
streakseims
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Post by streakseims »

Rofl!
6 million ways to pie....choose 1
streakseims
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Post by streakseims »

im only following all your posts jg so titchno1 sees me as all the latest and not JG
6 million ways to pie....choose 1
titchno1
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Post by titchno1 »

streakseims wrote:im only following all your posts jg so titchno1 sees me as all the latest and not JG
Haha. You will be busy then!
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Ruler of The World
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Post by Ruler of The World »

I had a secret betting book on this and JG was 1/10 to reply with a load of his own drivel :) I really should become a bookmaker.
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BFK
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Post by BFK »

The bookies always win!!
Roll_With_It_Russ
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Post by Roll_With_It_Russ »

BFK wrote:The bookies always win!!
apart from the ones that go bust, albiet smaller independants who think its simple business.
Plumy2k
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Post by Plumy2k »

@ 10/1 u shouldn't, if have give 2/1 or less.
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