The official SMTM hatez thread

[JG]

Ok we all know the score, same stable as FNC, but harder to milk imo.
Also lies through its teeth, but the core game aspects remain the same.

I had a reasonably successful day today. THis was the major fly in the ointment though. Mummys have never been a machine I've particularly played on any regular basis. After trying a few ton through the one that used to be in Solihull Shipleys after playing a few DONDs in said area, I realised how they worked. You forget stuff though don't you?

I had a couple of max tops on FNC in my time, but SMTM has ALWAYS been £35 bar one £70.

Anyway in for a HOF in a pub with SMTM. No interest in the SMTM, sometimes try a board, but unlike FNC which would probably give a board in a fiver, this loves to give NO NUMBERS WHATSOEVER or maybe a 1 in a whole £10 of credits. Two what you might call 'Swedeheads' were on the Mummy recycling and recycling. HOF was okish. Made about £15 then getting a bit borderline, £15 back for MS in box. 35 rubs, good enough.
Time for a toilet break and back into main bar and oooh, someone on HOF now, poor sod.
Thought, let's have a quid in the Itbox whilst we are here. A £2 win on Caeser's Palace (4 keys), a 56p win on Big Reds and a £1 win on Bullseye. Tried the new Connect4, wrote it off as computer can always beat you if it wants. What does draw equal? Also (issue 61) a new Blackjack game. Deals up four decks of cards. 4*52 shoes. Am I supposed to remember all those? I went for the dark haired female dealer and couldn't see any point in the game to be honest. Tried some Monopoly as someone in the quiz forum says it was well presented, offers gameplay to the punter, but you won't wiin anything. I found it to be well presented, offerring gameplay, but I didn't win anything.
Anyway a £3 loss for half an hour of dicking about on the Titbox and HOF is now free again. Surely good for another board. Alas, somehow the muntling has left it deader than I did when ripped out that MS. I saw him get DOND, maybe he got MS, but he seemed to be ploughing loadsa money into the box. Anyhow I bailed £8 down and relieved! Not worth waiting for, then Mummy was free....and full!
perhaps I was a bit hasty. Perhaps I should have ripped my £5 worth of value. However £9 for first board and I was already in 'all out mode'.
£50 to break the £5 block. £90 for a sly toggle to top. Flat £35 and next board lets me gamble up to £25 on a 6, didn't fancy bailing at £30 down looking for notoriously hard milking, so bashed the six to lose. Back in and next top for all back plus £5 extra, so £95 in. Flat. Gambled to £15 lost. Lots of Open Tombs. In the end pulled green features for S'nS for £25 to take my bank to £60. Still seemed to have life, but being tricky. Down to £50 in bank - more greens for a bounce onto ready steady go for £5 (good hit), oh dear. Then down to £50 and I get hot rocks and it's giving £10. However I've lost the will to live and loathe to go back in for flat £35, so take that, then it dies, next board £20 cost for naff all. Then next £10 for 2*£7 HRocks, a £3 win and a £5 toggle which tbh signalled me to get off it. £43 down.
Should have milked to find out if £7 happy or just not played at all! School boy error going in just because it had been cycled, but obviously an Invincible that'd be a good play.
Where does the value go? where does it go?

Mark we need your help. Does it pay random streaks to random strangers? Suddenly dumping a load into main bank so someone will either hit their £105 or get a load of easy milkers?
I have found it £10 ready, but surely only as some muntling has lost big on it earlier. If everyone took small wins on this, surely it'd never go to jackpot, or am I wrong? I mean eventually an Invincible would light up INVINCIBLE with a chance of £105, but this is just ghastly. It may suck and suck then NR for £25. How does the program fit together Mark?
I know it was a bad play, so everyone spare the sanctimony.

[pickareel]

you got involved in a full mummy,what did u do wrong?id hve done the same probably,rare as hell i play these but if theyve had play and someone leaves 1 full then you cant really leave it can you?

[Johnny Boy]

why did you start taking features?

if you gamlbed on £25 on a 6, i would of carried on pushing for the top, as clearly another JP was there.

[ob]

okay JG I don't want to sound patronising here, but mummy's are absolutely obviouis in my view, blag reds are so obvious, when they are there its clear, and the top often goes for £70 when they are there, the 3 jp's streak is rare yes, but that's the case with most £35 red machines.

I just can't understand people moaning about these, when 90%+++ of pubs have just bfm poor machines

HONEST TO GOD THIS IS NOT AN EXAGERATION THIS IS TRUE 90% = POOR BFM MACHINES WHICH ARE NON PROFITABLE

I don't understand why people are making touch money when such a shit selection of machines are present at the moment - ok new reds are good, but they are damn rare, and stoppers/cluedos are gone.... where's it coming from ?!

[PMK]

I hear whay you are saying ob, but all the brand new stuff is mainly in town centres. Venture to one or two outskirt areas and you will find some good stuff still around. Spoons/Yates/Edwards etc will all have dond/dond clones in now. There is still money to be made if your hungry for it! A lot of the time now I can't be bothered but once you get out there its worth it, you just gotta spend a few days checking locations to get a route worked out.

[ob]

I hear whay you are saying ob, but all the brand new stuff is mainly in town centres. Venture to one or two outskirt areas and you will find some good stuff still around. Spoons/Yates/Edwards etc will all have dond/dond clones in now. There is still money to be made if your hungry for it! A lot of the time now I can't be bothered but once you get out there its worth it, you just gotta spend a few days checking locations to get a route worked out.

mate I've spent a few weeks looking for stuff, but it's just too little in number to be profitable, plus alot of the pubs in outskirt areas are so easy to get barred from once you regularly go there...

also another thing... you say outskirts, and to me off time ago that meant nice pubs like beefeter and harvester/brewers fayre etc. these chains have literally no good machines in now at all, a cluedo or winstopper is about a 1 in 10000000000000000000000000000 shot, new red maybe one in 50....

[PMK]

Yeah Brewers really do love crap fruits dont they!!!

[Stopnstep]

£50 to break the £5 block

JG, i do sympathise with you but surely alarm bells should of been ringing if your not through that block by £20 - £30?

[Matt Vinyl]

OK, it's as boring as it can get, but isn't the sack-off the best method on this? Preventing that tomb from opening? Blue sevens are the key, but how long / much will it take to get them.

Haqven't seen one for a while now...

[gambogaz1]

Yes if you know you've gone into "force the fecker mode no matter what" just sack off all boards until the £15 starts spinning in.
OB you've been lucky if you've got regular £70 tops. These are as bad as S & L for flat £35's. I've had way more back to back flat tops than a £70 in 1 hit.

[GaryChandler]

I would say they arent too bad for £70 tops to be honest, and as ob says its not exactly hard to tell when there red or not either.

I think these are ok for chucking in the odd £15, £25 nudge wins, red boxes after aswell had that many of times on these.

[pickareel]

i watched to players force this out because it offered numbers up red,id just had a 70 top and drained the hell out of it,was gonna tell them but fuck it guess they wont be coming back to my areas hehe

[gambogaz1]

Numbers up and fast cash red need an audio saying "come on force me you mug"
By far the 2 most common red features offered when dead.

[Matt Vinyl]

fast cash red

That has to be the single most shite feature in the history of Reds. The only time I've ever taken it, was on a new machine where I didn't know the name of the feature (and I'd drained it or I was hoping to snare a quick £5 off of £1-£2 quid.) I don't think I've ever got over £4. lol

It has the same sort of delay as Red's Stop 'n' Step does, but the trouble is, as soon as you hit it, it can move down 3 or 4 cash places before stopping, as opposed to up!

Of course, I recognise all the FC's on Reds now, so avoidance is always easy!

[anfield road]

I hit £10 off red fast cash when milking in when it was redding!, I have a thing wheres by I will not force a SMTM regardless as they are utter shite and you can make more by taking features off them when they are red!

Thats if its a genuine red