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Bad Joke
Posted: Wed Mar 19, 2008 11:13 pm
by Mattb
Sorry to bring this all upon you, but it made me laugh...
Man goes into a library, and says to the librarian 'I'd like to borrow a book on suicide please'.
Librarian says 'Piss off, you can't borrow that, you'll never bring it back!'
Posted: Wed Mar 19, 2008 11:21 pm
by gambogaz1
Oh dear Matt!
thats terrible.
how about
Husband puts 10 cans of Stella in the
trolley, the wife takes them out saying 'They
cost £10, they're too expensive!'
Further down the aisle she puts a £20 jar of
face cream in the trolley.
He says 'Hold on a minute that's expensive'
She says 'But it makes me look so beautiful'
He says. . . .
'So does 10 cans of Stella, but at half the
BLOODY PRICE!'
that's gotta be worse
Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 12:54 pm
by Flying Spaghetti Monster
Well if we're doing bad jokes:
A scientist has invented a bra that stops breasts bouncing up and down and nipples sticking out in the cold...
...his colleagues have beat the **** out of him.
Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 12:56 pm
by Matt Vinyl
Mountain goers found a new work of landscape art buried in the snow near the summit of Mt. Snowdon, experts believe it to be a Constable...
Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 6:17 pm
by jonnyg323
Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the Nobel Prize?
He was outstanding in his field
now THATs funny
Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 9:55 pm
by itsme
I was walking past a mental asylum the other day when I could hear
" 13, 13, 13 "
Curious as I am, I found a hole in the fence and had a look through, Some bastard poked me in the eye, All I heard then was " 14, 14, 14,"
Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 10:16 pm
by jonnyg323
itsme wrote:I was walking past a mental asylum the other day when I could hear
" 13, 13, 13 "
Curious as I am, I found a hole in the fence and had a look through, Some bastard poked me in the eye, All I heard then was " 14, 14, 14,"
That's...terrible
Why does Noddy wear a bell on his hat?
Because he's a total and utter c**t
Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 10:38 pm
by Istenem
jonnyg323 wrote:Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the Nobel Prize?
He was outstanding in his field
i do enjoy that gag
Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 10:55 pm
by YoungKai
my personal fave. is:
someone childish wrote:Why are pirates pirates?
Because they Arrrrrrrr!
Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 11:13 pm
by mjd
Matt Vinyl wrote:Mountain goers found a new work of landscape art buried in the snow near the summit of Mt. Snowdon, experts believe it to be a Constable...
OOF!!
True though, should treat the mountains with respect! Theres a fine line between calculated madness and stupidity!
Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 12:20 am
by jonnyg323
what's red and sits in the corner?
a naughty strawberry.
-------------------------------
what do you call a 3-legged donkey?
a wonkey.
maaan i could go on forever, i love this thread
. screw fruit machines lets make this site all about bad jokes!
Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 12:28 am
by YoungKai
whats grey and can't climb trees?
a carpark
Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 12:37 am
by jonnyg323
Why did the plane crash?
Cos the pilot was a tomato...
Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 8:13 am
by ma71lda
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.
Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 9:04 am
by harry2
Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman in the pub, complete strangers sit down at the same table and start chatting. Englishman says to the Scottish chap, "What's your name then ?" The Scotsman replies " My name is Andrew, I was born on the St Andrews Day, November 30th". The Scottish man say to the English guy "So what's you name then ?". The Englishman replies," I was born on April 23rd and my parents named me George". They both turn to the Irishman quietly drinking his pint. "What's your name mate ?" they both ask.
" Pancake"