Fruit Machine Chat

1. Eating crisps at a party where different flavours, e.g. Salt n Vinegar and Cheese & Onion have been mixed together in all the bowls, meaning everytime you eat a crisp you run the risk of eating a flavour you don't like.

2. People who talk about Big Brother in such reverent terms, that if you couldn't quite hear who they were talking about, you'd swear they were talking about the Second Coming of Christ.

3. Progress bars when downloading stuff / installing programs... either progress steadily to 99% and then just pause for aeons, or get to the 100% and then just start a new one. WHAT IS THE EFFING POINT IN THAT?

junk mail and door too door salesman :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x

short people with umbrellas

foreign people walking around london slowly

chavs playing muzjaks through their cheap phones on public transport

check-out staff with ham fists

people who say i beg your pardon/sorry/say again/what's that when you know damn well they heard it the first time

Cannot stand little baldy men in Audi's who cut you up on the M1.
if i see him again im gunna rip his nuts off. TWAT. :x

Sue Denim wrote: foreign people walking around london slowly

.. and stopping at the bottom of an escalator and standing still while they read a tube map, causing a multi-commuter pile-up behind them ...

1. Anyone who insists on telling their bloody life story to the cashier in the local supermarket/corner shop while you stand behind them like a twat with a pint of milk. They might not have fuck all to do with the rest of their day - I have a job to go to.

2. What do cash machines do when you ask for a withdrawal? They give you your card back first, before the money. So why do people withdraw money first and THEN go through the rigmarole of putting the card/PIN back in to do some other related crap?

3. People who push their way in front to be the first on or off a train, despite the fact that they are the slowest person in town (sometimes with a shit load of luggage), and end up getting in every other buggers' way.

4. Anyone who drops litter in the street. You ARE selfish, lazy wankers.

Ah, that's better!

Smokers in pub doorways that think they are doing you a favour by moving out of your way so you can get in the fucking pub!

jeffvickers wrote:Smokers in pub doorways that think they are doing you a favour by moving out of your way so you can get in the fucking pub!

Jeff, you have my absolute agreement - not often I say that

I have no sympathy for smokers at all - if they really feel the need to kill themselves, why can't they go somewhere else and do it?

Pub doorways/Office entrances/Shopping Centre doorways/Tube Station entrances/Bus Stops (even though this is now illegal)/Coffee Shop doorways/you name it ... just get the hell out of my way!

my wisdom teeth so much bloody pain

Nixxy wrote:

jeffvickers wrote:Smokers in pub doorways that think they are doing you a favour by moving out of your way so you can get in the fucking pub!

Jeff, you have my absolute agreement - not often I say that

I have no sympathy for smokers at all - if they really feel the need to kill themselves, why can't they go somewhere else and do it?

Pub doorways/Office entrances/Shopping Centre doorways/Tube Station entrances/Bus Stops (even though this is now illegal)/Coffee Shop doorways/you name it ... just get the hell out of my way!

always take a quick breath and hold it whilst approaching...... nothing worse than 2nd hand smoke.

random things? eddie winning the lottery

the mystery beefy sticking his nose in

1, people who order things - wait for the order to be completed then order something else then do the bloody thing again. A fine example of this can be found in sandwich shops about 10 minutes before you need to be at work.


2, Old people. (the list is endless) why do they feel the need to venture out on weekday lunches - they have all frigging week to shop!


3, London communters - picture the scene, its 9.30 and theres folk running everywhere - i put it to them that they're late already so running will have no effect. chill out and walk to work - start the day off a bit better.


4, Finally - Soup! (but only when consumed from a bowl) what's the point - its a driink and a time comsuming one at that. its not filling its the ton of bread you eat with it that fills you. Its the savoury equivalent of a cup of tea and a pack of biscuits to dunk excepts its widely accepted and you use a bloody spoon to drink it with - a spoon! How long do these soup drinkers have?! the thing even has its own etiquette - JESUS!!!

Brilliant thread!

1. Things that are so obviously going to happen, but no-one listens to you stating that it's going to happen, and then when it does, they go 'Oh dear, look what happened!' Grr...

2. Someone taking the credit for something that you've shed blood, sweat and tears over, but if there's a minor error - we'll that's your fault!

3. Managers that actually do fuck all (sorry!), appear to be 'golden boy' to everyone else at work, but if you're on holiday for a week, they phone you up 3+ times a day completely bricking it about how to do something that 'only you can do'.

4. Food that looks lovely but tastes like crud.

5. Getting home from work and the house is in a complete state. Grrrrr!

6. The majority of programmes on TV, including any 'real life' type thing where they can make the fact of whether a dog will walk in a straight line past some flowers as dramatic as the end of a Bond film.

7. This poxy weather!

[quote="Matt Vinyl"]
3. Managers that actually do fuck all (sorry!), appear to be 'golden boy' to everyone else at work, but if you're on holiday for a week, they phone you up 3+ times a day completely bricking it about how to do something that 'only you can do'.
]

Ever heard of seagull managers? Every work has at least one, so called because they fly in, make a lot of noise, crap over everything then fly off again.