Now old Meo, we all know's got loads of dapper suits,
London-bred and he keeps his head, though he's got Italian roots,
Emotional when he keeps his cool, till he reaches the final,
But whether he wins he whether he don't: (Tony Meo) "I always pipe me eyeballs."
And our man Den, hours he's spent down the snooker hall,
On the old green baize, his mates seem amazed with his skills with a snooker ball,
But them long shots he never ever got, why, the old mind boggles,
But nowadays he pots the lot: (Dennis Taylor) "'Cos I wear these goggles."
Now Terry the Taff was born in a gaff in the valleys of the land of song,
And as the reds he puts to bed, he likes to sing along,
"If I win," he says with a grin, "it can only help me, can't it?"
I'll celebrate and buy another eight (Terry Griffiths): "Hairbrushes for me barnet."
But old Willie Thorne, his hair's all gorn, and his mates all take the rise,
His opponent said "Cover up his head, 'cos it's shining in my eyes,"
When the light shines down on his bare crown, it's a cert he's gonna walk it,
But it's just not fair giving off that glare - (Willie Thorne): "Perhaps I ought to chalk it."
Steve last year come very near to winning the snooker crown,
But he never got to put it on his ginger nut 'cos the black ball wouldn't go down,
His manager and all said "S*d that ball" but it helped him make his mind up,
Now he don't care who wins next year (Steve Davis): "'Cos he's got the rest of us signed up."