Fruit Machine Chat

I'm bored so lets list a few - get involved.

Was playing a lucky devil and couldn't key it and ended up about £70 in to it for no real reason.

Anyway local comes over and says "u won't win it dropped jackpot last night"

I say "well i've put loads in it" and he starts to watch me. So i'm knockin on £90 and it's now buzzing but i'm obviously going to be down.

So as i'm collecting nothing he says "u not collecting that tenner?" I say "i'm going for jackpot as i've put loads in" which is not even a lie.

He then says "well it paid jackpot last night so if u get jackpot u're fiddling it"

I didn't even respond and a few mins later it goes for £70 - I don't think i'm welcome back in there......

Another classic is a bar about a year ago the guy behind the bar says "i'm not saying ur cheating but on camera we've seen u put ur hand under the coin release"

Erm yeah - to collect the fucking coins!!!!

Come on who else has got some good n's....

"Someone has just dropped that" Less than £10 later it's backing.

"thats my holiday money your winning there"

"Nobodys had a JP of that yet and it's been here weeks" on a fuckin Rovers!!!

"you can play the machine, but we dont like people winning on it, its really only there for the regulars"


WHAT THE FUCK???

"thats my holiday money your winning there" this is funny when i hear this! I asked one landlord upon hearing this "Where were you going then?" then if replied: "Well I was going to Tenerife but now thanks to you I'm going to fuckin' Buttlins ain't I?".

How about when ur £150 into a machine and some1 walks over half way through and sees u get a £70 and says "jammy bastard"

I'm £70 down u cunt!

"Mines a pint!!"

"Beers are on him!"

I got told in an arcade recently that I couldn't play the extreme any more, because I "knew to much about it..."

But I was still welcome to play the party times, or any of the other trash they had in there. Fucking pikey cunts. Now I send my mate in for it.

"Get they beers in our kid, you've won jackers, and oi jus put a foiver in ee" I must have heard that dozens of times over the years in various rural somerset shit holes....

i was in mitchells arcade in falkirk, a very lomg time ago, it was my first visit , i deliberately lost £80 as i knew i would get in back as they had a

p1 golden game
lock n load
golden dragon
3 steps to heaven
classic slot

so i went back to the change desk and i was refused change and asked to leave, i asked why and they said i was playing the wrong machines !!

f*&^%£ing bastards it was the arcade by the bus station ithink.

Ah yes. Mitchell's like to ban anyone who knows about the "let 'em spin" cheat. Which of course means that their machines were always ripe for the taking. Sadly, their other arcade in the town has shut down now.

One memorable quote whilst playing a machine in Maryhill (a shite part of Glasgow where Taggart is set). I can't remember which machine it was, but I was a healthy wad into it when I was at the bar asking for change, the barman said:

"This isn't an amusement arcade son"

Normally I'd let it pass, but I was a bit pissed off, so I looked round sardonically at the decrepit interior and the pissed-up jakeys and said

"Well that's handy, cos I'm not having much fun".

And of course I got chucked out (and barred although there really was no need). Looking back on it, I think I did myself a favour.

well after taking £370+ (for £80 in!!!) on a HLS last week the gaffer is a bit sus and yesterday and tonight starts standing right next to me every time I'm on the thing,
Don't bother me actually, he's watching what I'm doing and aint got a clue, took £105 (for £30 in) last night and £120 (for £14 in) tonight while he was right next to me!

"Mines a pint" then came out, so WTF, bought him and 2 other staff a pint after he changed up the dosh to keep him sweet.

BTW thanks to the 'big lads' for filling it up for me yesterday and today, stick to your (exclusive £10Mil refit but won't have any machines because it don't keep with the 'upper' class image shite) golf club lads, cheers
;-)

And the other old one is some smelly little scrote sayin 'do ya wanna go half's mate' and offering up a quid when your 50+ into a machine and it's just about to drop - like yeh go on then - NOT!

Or your in a new haunt and some player comes up an thinks your a munter and wants to buy the machine off you for a tenner when you got IM!

my all time favourite ive mentioned b4 but for those who missed it??



pub on outskirts of litchfield , silly bar woman accused us of positioning a satellite over her pub with our mobile phones to bring in jackpot.

6502 wrote:well after taking £370+ (for £80 in!!!) on a HLS last week

Pardon my ignorance, but what does HLS stand for and what size hopper does it have to be able to pay out 370 sheets?

trayhop123 wrote:pub on outskirts of litchfield , silly bar woman accused us of positioning a satellite over her pub with our mobile phones to bring in jackpot.

That's all that bloomin' rocket science again. Not really fair messing around with satellites is it? Bit out of order I'd say, for someone who has never tooled I think manouvering satellites around is definitely crossing the line. As we all now, modern fruit machines pay out depending on the position of celestial bodies.

HLS = Hi/Lo Silver a £35 jackpot cat C machine. Obviously in 6502's location it must get played by a lot of maniacs.

Cardinal Sin wrote:

6502 wrote:well after taking £370+ (for £80 in!!!) on a HLS last week

Pardon my ignorance, but what does HLS stand for and what size hopper does it have to be able to pay out 370 sheets?

Forgive me your reverence for it's been a while since my last confession ahem , machine was Red's Hi low Silver and took at least 370 in 4 days in one week, for a total of 80 in!

trayhop: as for satellites !! ffs LOL did they think you were James Bond or something? mind you Litchfield mmmm,,,

Anyway off to bed as the wicker man has just finished Zzzz