Fruit Machine Chat

Decided to find a new route yesterday, no word of a lie, around 80% of pubs checked had "To Let or Business Opportunity" signs up". A hard fact of the smoking ban implementation. So, in come unsuitable applicants, then the beer turns shit, then the pubs shut down. Its all too common round here at the moment. Since the ban in one area, 9 village pubs, now 2, another area, 10 pubs, now 3.

The pub trade is dying, the amount of pubs shutting down is beyond belief
either that or just being converted 2 restaurants,
the brewerys should b greeting us with open arms 4 the price of a coke and bag of mccoys instead of barring us!
they brought it on themselves, the smoking ban
has played a big part in this though i must agree.

I read somewhere that 56 pubs each week (maybe each day, can't remember which) are closing. Thats some total, its a shame when decent publicans have shut up shop, yet places like 'spoons with ignorant managers and staff will be there til the end of time.

Spoons are a lot of the reason the smaller quieter pubs are closing.

Your average old man isn't stupid, he'll go sit in the cheeper comfy pub over his local...

However, if you'll allow me to digress... Its only another nail into the playing coffin.

Because THEN....

They ban smoking, had it in scotland for ages, and its hit a lot of the smaller boozers, landlords are making less and are more hostile towards players, as we are denting their already reduced profits.

People who smoke also have addictive personalities, and are a bit more irresponsible. (thats maybe a big strong but you know what I mean) So are those who play machines, so were losing some of our punters

THEN....

This is coupled with reds rolling for 70-105 after 10 mins play (which cost you 80 on mega spin but they'll never believe that!), so, were getting barred more as we are DEFINATELY fiddling the machines.

THEN...

There are more players/semi pro's/net enthusiasts. I however dont blame the net entirely for this, its a technologically evolving culture we live it and more and more people are wise to things like machines. Stuff like numbering, vivids and simple reds are easy to learn and easy to repeat. Either way its was a matter of time from when the industry started untill it got sussed. I started 11 years ago, and there was one other proper player local to the city. Now there are 7 and countless wannabies, most of the wannabies started on the net, but the proper players didn't.

THEN...

The bookies get rid, so the more involved player is being exposed less to machines and will probably end up playing them less in pubs. The casual bookies player even more so.

In scotland you can't play small towns. No bookies, few pubs that you'll get barred from anyway, and you certainly can't drink because your driving. And city/town centers are full of competition. It'll be a matter of time before the rest of the country goes like this.

The only pubs will be Spoons, and every male member of staff will watch anything playable and work together to tan them after their shift, ban anyone who looks like they know what their doing. And then the one pub this doesn't happen in is going to become player central.

Simply, as we all really already know, playing for a livings coming to an end. I give it 2 years max till is a minimum wage scenario, because there wont be enough to play, and when there is you'll just get barred.

Sorry if thats long and ranty... Just sick of the winter lull, and not got much faith in it improving again in a few months.

sod fruits.

no really sod them.

i was in my favourite pub earlier this evening and it was just me and two barmaids. it is a crying shame.

one of very, very few places near me where the pipes are clean.

if that place closes then i will weep an unblessed tear.

Does anyone know of any pressure groups that are surfacing to counteract a national tragedy waiting to happen?

jeffvickers wrote:Does anyone know of any pressure groups that are surfacing to counteract a national tragedy waiting to happen?

I wouldn't worry about it - in 30 years Britainistan will have a muslim majority and you won't have pubs and gambling anyway. Footage of fruit machines will be the odd repeat of DeadEnders or Corrie if not censored, or the German one in Phoenix Nights.
Tales of Gaming Lore will be clandestinely swapped between bearded old players in their 50's to 80's in secret conversations behind the Imam's back after preayer where they may feel safe.
Players who have fled the country may continue in some parts of Australia or the USA.
Gambling UK will be an old memory. In your lifetimes. You'd better believe it.

Hello Golden X, sorry, Father X, X Factor. Jibberrisshishness sorry.

You know I know so there we are.

I enjoy these visionary postings. Who knows what will happen? With the seemingly absurd logic of political progression, possibly exactly what you have described. Or will it?

Take a look at this......


In 2040, far more activity will take place via computer. We will be required by law to provide the government with extensive details on everything that we eat. Property and faeces will be subject to random inspection via remote faecal examination hardware which must be paid for by individuals. Insurance must be, by law, taken out on this hardware to protect against expensive malfunctions. Most high ranking government ministers will be shareholders in these highly profitable faecal examinator hardware insurance companies. It will be against the law to consume more than your weekly allowances of calories. Limits will also be imposed on carbohydrates, trans fats and certain types of processed food and additives.

Properties must be available for local council inspection at all times within sociable hours. Some foods will be rationed, so three bags or more of jelly babies in your sweet cupboard will be a £500 fine.

The food police will be the most hated movement in 21st century Britain. Branded the 'anti-pig pigs' by tabloid media. Obese people will be legally required to exercise under supervision. Foodstuffs will be RF tagged and linked with GPS satellites to extract data from our mouths, stomachs, foodstuffs and on line supermarkets.

Big corporations such as McDonalds will somehow be able to wangle it. Everyone will 'know' there is an illegal amount of carbohydrate in one cheeseburger, but any 'proof' will mysteriously disappear as will the person(s) with the proof.

Bob's greasy cyberspoon will go out of business.


Britanistan will not exist with a remote GPS DNA tracking system and a backlash from the late 20th century creating a significant tightening in deportation and immigration laws. Islam will still be in a very similar place with regards to UK political climate in 2040 as to what it is in 2008. Tabloid media will bemoan the fact that Muslims are exempt from certain 'food police' laws, due to exemption on religious grounds.

Fruit machines will be situated on line, as will all table games. Live casinos will be more of a rarity, they will turn into social gambling environments. There will be argument and a petition which claims that gambling should only be allowed inside of these institutions. This will get argued about but on line gambling will stay. the remaining casinos will be incredibly glamarous, hi-tech and owned by Internet tycoons who will use them as a live land based advertisement springboard for on line gaming products.


There will be a 'museum' in Bournemouth of old arcade games that will feature some of today's fruit machines.


Pubs will become live social interaction portals(LSIPS). Some of the 'rougher' LSIPS will have scampi fries for sale and will play fractrally generated warp tunes.


Drugs will still be illegal and the black markets in heroin, crack, mephamphetamine, honky goose, Park Street Fucknut and Blowjob McFudgy will be rife. Backhanders will still be around in 2040 - Christ it's only 32 years away. Police technology will advance, namely GPS remote matter opiod/lipo-sol- detection units. Sentences will be more lenient(*) and gangland bosses will use marketing tools to determine where they should pay their backhanders.



(*) Most prison sentences will be served on line. The 'detainee' will be required to log onto the prison server up to ninety six times a day at regular intervals. Web cams will check detainee validity and punishments such as lines may be issued.

I must not chop people's heads off with an axe.
I must not molest young children.
I must not ingest over 95g of fats in one day.



Hope that, DAZzling insight helps.

Take care now....

Thanks Jackpot 'blooping' George....that made me laugh but also worry a little as I can't help but think that's somewhere near the truth.

I think the days of local pubs are numbered. I genuinely fear an introduction of alcohol 'smart' cards. We're each issed an ID/smart card which we can use to buy units of alcohol. Once your weekly limit is up you will have to pay an additional £2 per unit in tax to cover the additional healthcare costs. There will be 3 exceptions:

- Any minority religious groups who may have to consume alcohol as part of a ceremony (unless you're Christian...obviously)

- The unemployed who don't have an income so we can't justify taxing them more. The unemployed will, instead, get vouchers for free alcohol which can be redeemed in any one of the towns 14 'Spoons (an additional 'free booze' booklet will be issued for every child you have providing there is no fathers surname on the birth certificate)

- If you fall into one of the above catagories and also hold a blue badge for parking, the alcohol will be delivered (in hamper form) to the front door of your council mansion twice a week.

-MP's will naturally be exempt as the stress levels of ruining our once-great country muct be huge.

Fruits will, of course become illegal as will dancing in nightclubs in order not to offend Muslims and of course moormans (sp?). There will be new 'modesty laws' resticting the wearing of mini-skirts and hotpants thus putting the seal on "reasons to visit town on a weekend".

You just wait and see.....

Mopst of the reasons that pubs are closing is due to the supoer marketings having a price was on booze.


Only in Metro today I read that Sainsburys are doing cider at 26p a pint, Tecos do a 500ml can of blue and white striped lager for 22p...

Dunhamzzz wrote:Tecos do a 500ml can of blue and white striped lager for 22p...

Yeah, but it's 'orrible!!